real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
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