You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
The bar would not accept my money. I have reached God status here
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
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