is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
DON NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES WATCH CLOWN PORN.
Randomize
