Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
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