Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize