I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Randomize
