Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
Jerry, you need to find god
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
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