Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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