the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
Randomize
