Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
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She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
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Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
Randomize