Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Randomize
