oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
I didn't know where you were for like 15 minutes and then I went in the bathroom splashing water on the mirror and throwing hand towels around saying that you were "redecorating"
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
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