I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize