i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
Randomize