just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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