and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
