Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
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