summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Randomize