I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
