This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
You took a bar mat shot.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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