How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
Randomize
