On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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