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• (216): View more from Ohio

  Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.

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• (509): View more from Washington

  I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM

  (909): View more from California

  I'm scared to ask why.....

  (509): View more from Washington

  1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.

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• (763): View more from Minnesota

  He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.

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• (715): View more from Wisconsin

  i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...

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  21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body

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• (310): View more from California

  You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.

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• (843): View more from South Carolina

  throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected

  (1-843): View more from South Carolina

  since when the fuck is that glamorous?

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• (919): View more from North Carolina

  are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?

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• (646): View more from New York

  So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking

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• (240): View more from Maryland

  and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.

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  27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst

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• (925): View more from California

  Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.

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• (336): View more from North Carolina

  I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist

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• (520): View more from Arizona

  I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.

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• (860): View more from Connecticut

  When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."

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• (770): View more from Georgia

  She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower

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• (409): View more from Texas

  I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.

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