sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
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