I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
Randomize
