I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
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