I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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