Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
Thanks for telling my landlord that the poop stain was yours and not my secret dog.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
some chick tossed a drink in your face at the bar last night. your mouth was opened so i think you ended up swallowing at least half of it. good job.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
Randomize