If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
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