I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
Randomize