If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
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