I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
She legitimately thought I was hiding in the fridge, then she checked the second one to be sure
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Randomize
