well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Randomize
