My first STD was from a foam party
Your mouth is God's brothel.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
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