Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize
