I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Randomize
