I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
This is classic penis vs brain.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
Randomize
