so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
smell my finger.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
