They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Randomize
