this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize