if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
foreskin is a definite game changer
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
