Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
He had one of those small greek statue penises
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
