no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize
