There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
I'm about to take my first shit since thursday. I'm scared. pray for me. If I don't make it, tell my family I love them.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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