Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
These Are 23 Of The Most Uncomfortable Questions You Can Ask
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
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My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.