Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Randomize
