I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
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