we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Do you know why I woke up with a half peeled lemon in my purse with a post-it that said "eat me" on it?
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
I would ride that face into the sunset
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
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