You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
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