The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Randomize
